Grandfather

I went to see my Grandpa in the hospital today. He has always been a very healthy man but as of yesterday he is in the hospital and he has leukemia. He looks okay but is very tired and he talked with his eyes closed. We do not know much about his condition; the test results were not yet in. He was talking like he is going to die tomorrow. He spoke with an amazing assurance that he has lived his life well and he talked as one who is so very ready to go home. I do not want to think that my Grandpa is going to die. But I do not want to see him suffer or to fight against that which he is so ready for.

I love the stories that my Grandpa has to tell. He has not exactly lived a conventional life. Never graduated from high school, a farm boy, an Air Force Pilate, a pastor, a missionary, twice a husband, a father and a grandfather to many. Listening to his stories today reminded me of the significance and of the brevity of life. I do not know that my Grandpa is on his deathbed. But if he is, he can say that he has arrived there having lived well, having sucked all the marrow from life, and he has made tremendous impact on this world. I remember a few months ago my Grandpa’s name was mentioned in the paper by a man who sited him as a huge influence on his spiritual journey. My Grandpa had not had any contact with this man in years. Everywhere my Grandpa goes he knows at least five people in the room. His life has not been easy but it has been full and it has been good. And he is leaving a story, a legacy, a testimony behind and the world is a different place because he has lived in it.

Today I was inspired by my Grandpa because he did not mention any regrets but only all the things he was so glad that he could have been a part of during his time here. I cannot imagine having so much peace in the face of death and I want to live my life in order to arrive at the end having lived so full and so well and having so much to leave behind.